The danger in communicating with word pictures rests in the reality not everyone sees it like you saw it.Read Now
The danger in communicating with word pictures rests in the reality not everyone sees it like you saw it.
Not everyone likes broccoli, asparagus and Brussels sprouts. I do. I am not offended by the smell of them cooking because I enjoy eating them. Some people just run out of the house when the smell them cooking.
There are images which have the same effect. When I say “living in Mayberry” many people see a quaint little town where everyone knows everyone. A place where the deputy is a goofball but the local sheriff is everyone’s friend and hero. A family centric time in American history where life was simple, easy and endearing.
When I say “Mayberry” others see a time, a place, an era of racism, hatred, bigotry and a lack of inclusion. They see separate water fountains, separate restrooms and segregated schools. They feel the angst of being less than their neighbors and peers. They hurt for their parents and family members who were blasted with water canons, beaten for no reason, arrested and imprisoned it’s no just cause.
See the word “Mayberry” is of itself a word picture. It could be described is greater and greater detail until you can hear the jingle of the bicycle bell as it passes on the street and smell Aunt Bees apple pie cooking in the kitchen. In the moment some people will resonate with a peaceful day gone by which they would love to return to. Others will tremble in fear, pain and anxiety of a day they had wished to never recall.
Leaders and communicators must be sensitive to the provocation each word picture might create and then choose metaphors and stories which are emotional sculpted to draw others into the desired emotional state without manipulation or causing undue pain.
How does cognitive dissonance apply to leadership and the way you communicate?Read Now
How does cognitive dissonance apply to leadership and the way you communicate?
Another work you may have heard is congruent. Basically they both mean that you truthfully say and do what you feel and what is most consistent with reality.
The idea of “fake it until you make it” can often become an outright fantasy. Faith and fantasy are not the same.
As an example a barking cat or meowing dog or even an English speaking, space ship flying raccoon might appear in a fantasy based movie. To truly appreciate these characters you must suspend your disbelief because these things don’t represent any known form of reality. Fantasy.
The belief that one day you will write a book, sing on stage, be well known around the world, these are all possibilities within the realm of reality. Potential horizons which have not yet happened, but which could happen if all the effort, passion and process necessary is applied to achieve them.
When leaders who have no skill, no passion, no process but make promises of their future - the past often reveals glaring failures - the people around them don’t hear what one day could be, they hear a barking squirrel or a talking raccoon.
Consistency is key. Confident, reality based faith, belief in truth and potential these are the elements of leadership people need to follow a great leader.
All of these qualities, good or bad are revealed in the stories you tell everyday.
Photo by Richard Burns on Unsplash
R U Judgy McJudgerson? Do you judge others based on your own standards or comfort zones? Most people do. Leaders should not us such an arbitrary standard.
Most people know the old saying “judge not lest you be judged” yet they judge others anyway. Ironically, what is meant by the phrase and the way most people apply or have little to do with each other.
It is also true that many people don’t see judgement in the way they scrutinize or criticize others. ESPECIALLY when what they are “judging” are good deeds.
No one wants to be “judged” when they are being held accountable for their bad behavior or bad choices. We all have a million excuses for why we do what we do. But try to give up a bad habit which you once shared with friends like, drinking, smoking, cussing, gambling, staying out late on work or school nights and see how long it takes them to SHAME YOU INTO A DRINK!
Leaders need to set a standard which is clear, objective, fair and equitable. Not a double standard. Not two sets of rules. Then do all you can to meet or exceed the same standard you hold others too.
Photo by JJ Jordan on Unsplash
Leaders are sometimes more bent on being right than being truthful. What does it mean to relinquish your right to be right?
Do you know someone who is so determined to be right they will argue about trivial matters? They will even argue the details of the surroundings in the illustration you are trying to make —- completely ignoring the point.
Today’s confrontation laced culture thrives on this form and style of communication because of the high value placed on intersectionality and the divisiveness of our media and politics.
Leaders need to determine early in the conversation what is the real point and stick to it.
Who is your heart broken for?
Who do you see in pain and you just can’t stand by silently?
Whose pain do you resonate with like it was your own?
If you are an entrepreneur you can choose for your income to drive your inspiration or you can choose for your inspiration to drive your income!
You can identify a need “which people will pay to have their needs met” or you can identify a need which you can uniquely fulfill and trust the income will follow.
Who is your heart broken for is a deeper question than “who is your target market?” But these questions are directly related. Because “Who is you heart broken for” already defines the condition, the circumstances, and the problem in need of a solution. Once you align it with the people who are broken, you will know your target audience avatar.
I challenge you to SEEK THOSE WHO NEED YOUR HELP AND THE WELL BEING OF THEIR HEART AND NOT THEIR MONEY.
We know bad things happen to good people. Are bad things done BY good people?
Bad actions are always a result of bad thinking which always begins in the heart (emotional center or will) of an individual.
Corruption in government, just like corruption in business, school districts, and marriages starts with the heart of an individual then creeps in to their immediate associates and eventually invades the culture like a virus.
If you want your life, your business, your family and your government to be corruption free keep your heart pure.
Photo by Alex Iby on Unsplash
Autonomy. Is it real? Are any of us truly independent or are we really more interdependent than we admit?
Unity and unison are not the same thing. Unity and harmony are more alike. Independent and unison are not the same (duh?) independent would be a solo!😁
But the harmony of unity is much more interdependent than we imagine.
Sounds like real deep music their or philosophizing but it’s not. It’s just a basic law which describes how much we as humans need and rely on each other. HOWEVER, we all need the space to be ourselves... To be who we’re created to be... To express our originality and uniqueness and to live in our own gifts, strengths and talents and yet - with regard and respect for everyone else who is doing the same thing.
In life, It’s called growing up!!! In families it can be a beautiful thing if done well and done on a healthy way. In a team, the same level of harmony is required.
Lead like that.
Are you “everything to everyone” to the extent you have struggles with your own identity?
May 16 will be three years since the launch of Tell It Like It is TV and the Leading Leaders Podcast. That’s 1095 days, 939 business days, less holidays and travel days means just over 900 podcasts have been recorded and distributed via social media, iTunes, YouTube, Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook and my own website www.jlorennorris.com a combined small tribe of friends and followers pushing just over 15,000.
It has been an evolution of discovery. What message style is most conducive? Which audience is most responsive? What part of the day? Which days of the week? How many words to I write to accompany the video for SEO sake? When and where do I record? Do I write a script? Where do I get my content? How do I serve all these people and remain true to myself????
Perhaps you have toyed with the idea of having a blog or podcast. Perhaps you are ready to venture into video, live or recorded, preplanned and scripted or off the cuff, alone or interview style. If you have you need to get to Blog And Video Con May 2-4.
I will be speaking on StoryPower. Misty Gilbert will be speaking, she has written thousands of blog posts. Tim Gillette will be speaking as out main trainer and host.
You don’t have to be great to come, but if you come it will be a good start to being great online.
$297 VIP tickets are still available at www.BlogandVideoCon.com
***But, I can get you discounted tickets for only $197 JUST CLICK HERE.
And save you $100 if you click here
Yesterday was an amazing day which culminated in meeting a networking legend because of networking. Ooohhh the irony!
A few weeks ago I got a LinkedIn message from a connection I had not stayed in contact with. Andrea Adams-Miller is a publicist for Red Carpet (We meet at a James Malinchak event 5 yrs ago) and one of her clients is a radio show called Amplified with Ken Rochon. She asked if I would consider being on the show to talk about the work I do in leadership and I agreed.
One week ago today, she and Ken were in Dallas for Erik Swanson's event Habitude Warrior Conference and I was available to drive them from the airport to the hotel and we had dinner with my wife on the way.
5 days later Ken and I are driving to Austin when... 😁 watch the video of you want the rest.
Your Host of AMPlified with Ken Rochon (The Umbrella Syndicate) and co-host & producer Andrea Adams-Miller (The RED Carpet Connection) bedazzle you this day with two talented and wise CEO's J Loren Norris, Leading Leaders, & Bryon Stephens, The Excellence Leadership Institute.
Listen LIVE and to REPLAYS at https://www.voiceamerica.com/show/2501/amplified
Connect. Connect. Connect. Respect and connect.
Why should you bother building relationships with people who are not like you? Why bother building relationships with people who can offer you nothing?
Too often I hear people say “I am not going to waste my time with...” and they list a TYPE of person whom they deem unworthy of their attention.
I also hear people say, “I can’t be bothered with someone who hasn’t already succeeded where I want to succeed.” Maybe that’s about age, education level or accomplishment. Maybe it’s just about pride!!
Leaders must be humble enough to learn from anyone. They must be wise enough to to who they are learning from, but humble enough to learn anyway.
So CONNECT with people of all walks, all ages, all races and religions with an open mind, and open heart and RESPECT.
YOU MIGHT LEARN SOMETHING!
Your Story is your super powerRead Now
StoryPower is critical on your path to success.
Join the movement to begin rewriting your story.
Would you be shocked if I told you the puzzle company knows what the picture is on the puzzle inside the box?
Would you shocked if I told you your life script is more like a MadLibs with millions of blanks to be filled in by you?
Photo by TK Hammonds on Unsplash
Watch the Facebook LIVE version below. Edited video to be uploaded later.
I also believe, choice is a decision made by individuals which carries a huge weight of consequence and therefore must be exercised with caution, conscience and maturity.
We don’t allow a toddler to decide what’s for breakfast or when to drive the family car. We don’t encourage a loved one to operate a motor vehicle while under impaired judgement. These are maturity based limited choices.
Leaders also have an obligation to limit choices, WITHOUT limiting free will. Realistically offering, genuine options which are well within the scope of the chooser to be employed wisely.
Photo by Riccardo Pelati on Unsplash
Sometimes what you need is different perspective. It’s not JUST what you’re looking at, it’s the way you’re looking at it.
Comics, comedians and great communicators have a “different way of seeing things.”
Dr. Caroline Leaf calls it the MPA - multiple perspective advantage - a simple wiring mechanism in the human mind.
Comedian Michael Jr. says he sees things seven different ways because he grew up with dyslexia.
We all have the ability to see things differently and we should use it.
Photo by Waldemar Brandt on Unsplash
Why do goals fail?Read Now
Is it the failure of the “goal setting process” or the failure of the “goal achieving process”?
Many people make a decision to commit!
They stop short of making a commitment to that decision.
Commitment is the key. Consistency in the small and daily tasks toward any goal will eventually payoff.
Most of us have a dream or a hope or a wish which we call a goal. We muddle through life expecting this “thing” to happen to us or for us or to simply show up one day.
However, if we were asked to audit our activities over the last 24 or 48 hours there would be no identifiable concerted effort toward that goal. If we look back in earnest, it may have been days, weeks or even months since the idea of the dream came to mind and as yet, it isn’t even written down somewhere. That’s not commitment!
If you want it, you must believe three things:
1. it’s possible
2. you’re worthy and
3. It’s going to happen.
Then you need to act as if these three are true by committing to behavior, choices and daily activity which make the goal more a reality every day.
DO SOMETHING TODAY WHICH REMINDS YOUR GOAL YOU ARE IN HOT PURSUIT.
Photo by Estée Janssens on Unsplash
Would people define you by the music you listen to? Can you tell when music alters your mood, personality or character?
Do you choose music based on the task at hand?
See. You know for a fact music alters your mood, your concentration level, your emotional state, your memory and your level of learning, retention and recall.
“Leadership is influence nothing more and nothing less.” John C Maxwell.
Music is a leader in your life!!! Where is it Leading you?!?
Photo by Spencer Imbrock on Unsplash
Peg moments are those times in life when other people have used verbal elephant training to tie you to your past. You don’t have to accept their pegs.
An elephant is trained from birth with a single peg. Throughout life each of us will likely receive dozens if not hundreds of pegs from other people. These “verbal pegs” come in the form of criticism, judgment, accusations and condemnation.
When someone judges your talent as a seedling against someone else’s at full maturity rather than seeing it as potential, the might peg you as a failure.
When someone declares you to be “just like ________” (insert name of someone hateful or unappreciated) the might peg you as an outcast.
When someone cannot see your positive attributes, your character strengths and your willingness to do good, they might peg you as a waste of time.
You are free to pull up those pegs and move on without them.
Leaders should work hard to not place pegs in the lives of their followers or team. They should also be on guard to help pull up any pegs which are revealed.
This episode is also a segment in the course Live A More Excellent Life - Learn more at jlorennorris.com/live
Why does the teacher ONLY come when the student is ready?? And how do they even know the student is ready?
Have you ever heard someone say, perhaps yourself say, “I ain’t even tryin’ to hear that!”
Or “Who do you think you are to tell me anything? You don’t know me!”
Or “Who died and made you boss?”
Those are all expressions from people who struggle to learn. Not like a learning disability but more like a learning inability due to unwillingness.
If the teacher has not yet “shown up” in your life, it is time to ask yourself if you are ready to submit yourself and be the student, regardless who the teacher is for this season.
Photo by Thái An on Unsplash
Banana trees, struggle as the night, will never, ever produce oranges! E V E R ! Why?!? Because the fruit comes from the root!
Banana roots. Banana fruits. Angry roots. Angry fruits. Dead roots. Dead fruit.
I train people in leadership communication with an intentional focus on storytelling. Most people see this as a “speech coach” or a “branding coach” because their understanding leads them to see STORY only as a mechanism for connecting with others for the purpose of a sale or transaction.
Let me drop a truth bomb in your lap. The single most important story you will ever tell, the story which will lead to your success or demise, the story which will LITERALLY define you is NOT your “elevator pitch” it’s not your “best speech story” it’s not even the public presentation of your “rags to riches” story of personal transformation. No!! Emphatically NO!
The most important story you will ever utter will be the one bouncing around in your mind. The collection of your memories which you choose to recall and the ideas you TELL YOURSELF!
That’s why I teach, train and insist: The message and the messenger are inseparable. Pineapples will not produce ketchup.
Photo by Jametlene Reskp on Unsplash
Insecure leaders have a hard time promoting others for fear they will lose their position of authority or next promotion.
Ask me how I know...
Pride is a tragic result of insecurity. Not the good kind of pride which comes from genuine and well deserved confidence, but the bad kind of pride which is often simply over inflated ego.
This kind of pride and arrogance often leads us down a path to self destruct because it is driven by the need for the approval of others. The unspoken hope rests in the desire to be secure in ourselves when others speak well of us. We seek validation from peers, strangers and even subordinates.
Can you see the vicious cycle? An insecure leader cannot promote or even praise a subordinate for fear of loss, but simultaneously they are bound in their own success by the need to be liked and approved of by those they lead.
Ya. Been there. Done that. Glad to be in a place where I can see the signs and crush them when they come up. 😁
Do you speak differently to your dog than your car? Do you speak differently to your spouse than your siblings?
Do you speak differently to your boss than to your clients?
Because they all hear, understand and relate differently to you. They all have their own quirks and idiosyncrasies. They all have different expectations of you.
So is the difference between “anyone who will hire me” and your ideal client. When your marketing, your blog, your podcast, your sales material speaks a certain way, tone, verbiage, vocabulary etc. you may lose a segment of your desired audience or attract an audience you don’t want.
Choosing WHO you want to serve will drive how and why you communicate with them.
Closing the deal... When is the right time to ask without being pushy?
What are the “buying signals” you look for?
How do you know when to ask for the sale?
Perhaps you have heard “sex sells”. You know what else sells? Scarcity! Real, imagined or even conjured scarcity. Sure, there are products with limited availability like rare and precious stones or metals. There are also unscrupulous sales persons and marketers who want you to feel like a fool for not making a buying decision RIGHT NOW!!
Many of these same marketers will follow the “high pressure sale” with a money back guarantee. Again, the guarantee might well be about their confidence in the product, service or solution they offer. It may also be a way for them to alleviate the guilty conscience for having pressured you into buying so quickly. “This offer is only good until the end of the month/ week/ day/ event/ ... UNTIL I WALK OFF STAGE - then it goes back up to the regularly over inflated price (which no one has ever paid - cause I just made it up for this promotion - like jewelry during the holidays) take advantage of me and my crazy generosity by signing up right NOW!”
Look, a good product appeals to a self selected avatar like honey to bees, cats to milk, toddlers to things they shouldn’t be climbing, and dogs to cars. If you have a solution which truly does what it claims, delivered in a quality product and with a service standard you can be proud of, you will have customers and clients in abundance.
Price won’t be an issue, false scarcity won’t be needed, manipulation will not be required. Word of mouth will create a demand. Customers will line up like a Chick-fil-A drive thru and they will all have money in hand to exchange with you.
Yes, you have to market. Yes, you have to have a sales conversation. Yes, you have to offer something of real value. Yes, you MUST deliver a quality product or service. Yes, success will follow effort and excellence.
Who is your avatar? Did they self select? What difference does it make toward YOUR success?
I have heard people when starting a business claim, “I just want to help people.” Those people often end up broke and back at a job soon.
I have heard people when starting a business claim, “I just want to do the work I love.” Many of these people will also be back at a job soon doing work for someone else... work which the absolutely loathe.
I have heard people when starting a business claim, “I tried doing ONLY the work I love, I have tried HELPING people and both of them pay the same, NOT WORTH A FLIP!”
Ok. I must confess, I was among the many who said all three of these statements.
Finally there are those who when starting a business say, “I will only pursue potential customers who I already know to have money. I will shape my products, services, pricing and branding to appeal to them and that will make me rich.”
Yet, there is another category of mindset I believe entrepreneurs should consider... WATCH THE VIDEO to learn about “self selecting avatars.”
Insuperable Vision Workshop - Audio Download
Insuperable Vision Workshop - Audio Download with worksheets
Day after day I meet people who are struggling just to make ends meet. They are adrift in this vast sea of humanity holding on to their job, their family, their home, and their car with all they've got. They see their life experiences and education as the last hope to find their purpose and identity. They gather, fill and stuff all the money they can into every opportune investment. Yet they are empty, frustrated, angry and just plain fed up.
We have all experienced that moment; when we find yourself stuck in traffic, yelling at random strangers to do what they wish they could... but can't... GO!
The idea that life can be better than it is today is like the flame of a candle fighting for all its worth to stand against the tempest.
We all want a better life.
Even when life is good, we want more.
That idea, that flame, is the hope that lives in the hearts and minds of all of us. Should that flame be extinguished, hope itself may well go with it. It is the rut of hopelessness that traps many would be shining stars and buries that glow from the sight of the world. It is the rut of hopelessness that extinguishes that flame.
Lives that would have been a beacon to the wandering are lost at sea themselves. Inspirations of success that would have been the voices crying out to all who suffer are hidden away in their own stale lives, they cannot share who they are or what the world needs from them.
It is my passion to help you find your purpose. I want to see you become successful, but more than that to be free!
Without vision people perish.
Without vision, we seem to be lost, mind numb robots following the herd into the abyss that is everyday life. We do not live intentionally without a vision for our future. We do not live passionately without a vision for our future. We do not live productively without a vision for our future. We certainly cannot lead without a vision for our future and a vision for the future of those we lead.
This audio course will inspire and instruct you to create a vision which will become a significant driving force in your life.